New Camp Rules for Doc’s Viewpoint

(revised 10/1/04)

 

1.     No pissing, farting or shitting into the wind when out on a boat

 

2.     When pissing out of the cabin at night or in a rainstorm, your entire penis must be out of the doorway opening

 

3.     Jimmy cannot use that shitty little white jig if it becomes dilapidated      

 

4.     Ralph cannot cast more than 1000 times per day

 

5.     Rick (“dog fish king”) has to eat all dogfish caught by him

 

6.     Ron has to pick a retirement date (or bury it at sea) for the 1970’s green flannel shirt he keeps bringing to Canada each year expecting it to catch another 18 pound pike

 

7.     During poker, Ralph cannot make the currency rules as to what coins/bills (Canadian vs. US) we use to play with

 

8.     Rick has to remove his cigar labels prior to feeding his stogies to the fish

 

9.     Bob cannot fish past 2:00 pm on Friday

 

10.   Rick is the new and official fish fryer, taking over duties from Rich

 

11.   We will have a minimum of 2 fish meals

 

12.   We will have a minimum of 1 egg breakfast

 

13.   Ralph shall not force his spam allotment on any other human being or animal

 

14.   Rick shall take the first shit of every morning and take the lantern to warm up shitter; 8 minute limit/person thereafter

 

15.   Drunkenness is allowed and encouraged

 

16.   Everyone does dishes at least once

 

17.   All fish contests will be agreed upon up front

 

18.   Rick needs to take that Erie Dearie off his line for at least 10 minutes

 

19.   Everyone has to at least take a sponge bath once during the week or thrown in the lake

 

20.   Shaving is not allowed

 

21.   Rick cannot make us take the boat out before 6:00 pm on Friday

 

22.   Bob can’t tell more than 10 jokes per day